I am changing
big things coming, moving, shifting
and thank fucking christ it is about time
the scorpion, the snake,
willing to drop it's guard for a moment.
am I willing?
have I a choice?
Will my enemies come for me now? of course they will. It will be their call. All I can do is let go.
I bought a book called Intimacy by Osho, the bigger man is willing to face the fear that is Love, surely. I figured I need to learn something here.
other than the involuntary outburst of laughter that brought the 'guru' section of Borders bookstore to a momentary stand still when I read the line -
'intimacy means exposing yourself before strangers'
I found the message I was needing right after that in its pages.
I can't get past the first chaper at the moment, I just keep going over it. finding something new release inside me from the words. I want to share a few
...intimacy brings you close to a stranger. you have to drop all your defenses; only then is intimacy possible. and the fear is that if you drop all your defenses, all your masks, who knows what the stranger will do with you?....
...everybody wants intimacy because otherwise you are alone in this universe...you want to be intimate with the other person... you want them to drop their defenses....but you are not dropping your defenses.....
....you have to accept yourself in totality....You have been condemned by everyobdy you have learned one thing: self-condemnation. You go on hiding it, it is not something beautiful to show others. You know ugly things are hidden in you, you know evil things are hidden in you, you know animal is hidden in you.
....If you are simple, loving, open, intimate, you create a paradise around you. If you are closed, constantly on the defensive, always worried that someone may come to know your thoughts, your dreams, your perversions, you are living in hell.
..we are fragile beings - the most fragile in existence. this frailty is not something to be condemned-it is the highest expression of consciousness....the higher expression of anything becomes weaker....it's beauty is because of its not being strong.....everything that is beautiful is going to be very momentary....all you can say is "I am in love with you this moment, and I will give my totality to you. about the next moment I know nothing."
nodoby knows anything about the future...the only thing that is in your hands is your life....by opening yourself to many people you become richer. And if you can live in deep love, in deep friendship, in deep intimacy with many people, you have lived rightly....
without intimacy you are surrounded by strangers, with intimacy you are surrounded by friends, by people who love you.
everybody is afraid of intimacy